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Medical Advocacy: Get the Care You Deserve

Women's health concerns are too often dismissed, minimized, or attributed to stress. You deserve to be heard, to have your symptoms investigated properly, and to receive evidence-based treatment. These scripts and strategies will help you advocate effectively in medical settings.

Last Updated: January 15, 2025

Why Medical Advocacy Matters

Research Shows the Problem

Women wait an average of 7-10 years for an endometriosis diagnosis, often seeing multiple doctors who dismiss their pain.

Women are less likely than men to receive pain medication and more likely to have symptoms attributed to mental health.

PCOS takes an average of 2+ years and 3+ doctors to diagnose despite affecting 1 in 10 women.

You're Not Imagining It

If you've been told your symptoms are 'normal' or 'just stress' despite significant impact on your life, that's dismissal.

If you've been made to feel like you're overreacting to severe pain, that's inadequate care.

You deserve better, and these tools will help you get it.

Advocacy Works

Clear communication about symptom impact increases the likelihood of appropriate testing.

Prepared, specific questions help providers understand what you need and make it harder to dismiss your concerns.

Knowing when to seek a second opinion can be the difference between suffering and proper treatment.

Red Flags: Signs of Medical Dismissal

These are warning signs that your concerns aren't being taken seriously. If you encounter these, it's time to advocate more strongly or find a new provider.

Your symptoms are dismissed without examination or testing

Why this matters: Physical examination and appropriate testing are standard of care for new or changing symptoms

You're told it's 'all in your head' or 'just anxiety'

Why this matters: While mental health can affect physical symptoms, physical causes must be ruled out first

Your pain is normalized or minimized

Why this matters: Severe pain that disrupts daily life is never 'normal' and deserves investigation

Provider refuses to order requested tests without explanation

Why this matters: You deserve to understand why tests aren't being ordered if symptoms suggest they might be helpful

You're made to feel like you're overreacting or being difficult

Why this matters: Advocating for your health is not being difficult—it's being responsible

Birth control is the only solution offered without discussing alternatives

Why this matters: While hormonal contraception can help many conditions, it's not always appropriate and alternatives exist

Advocacy Scripts

Copy these word-for-word or adapt them to your situation. The goal is to be clear, specific, and persistent without being confrontational. You're asking for standard care, not special treatment.

How to Prepare for Your Appointment

Preparation increases your chances of being heard and getting appropriate care. Here's what to do before, during, and after your medical appointments.

Before Your Appointment
  • Track symptoms for 2-3 months (frequency, severity, timing in your cycle)
  • List all current medications and supplements with dosages
  • Note what you've already tried and whether it helped
  • Write down your main concerns in order of priority
  • Prepare specific questions you want answered
  • Bring previous test results if you have them
  • Know your family health history (especially reproductive health)
During Your Appointment
  • Start with your most important concern—don't bury the lead
  • Be specific about how symptoms affect your daily life
  • Use concrete examples: 'I miss work 2 days per month' vs. 'It's bad'
  • Take notes or ask if you can record the conversation
  • Ask for clarification if something isn't clear
  • If dismissed, use the advocacy scripts below
  • Get a printed summary of the visit and any test orders
After Your Appointment
  • Review your notes while the conversation is fresh
  • Follow up on any promised test orders within a few days
  • Note the timeline for when you should hear results
  • If you didn't get answers, consider whether to follow up or seek a second opinion
  • Document any concerning interactions (dismissal, refusal to test, etc.)

When to Seek a Second Opinion or New Provider

Clear Signs It's Time
  • Your provider consistently dismisses your concerns without examination or testing
  • You've used advocacy scripts and still aren't being heard
  • You feel rushed, judged, or blamed during appointments
  • Your symptoms have persisted or worsened without explanation
  • Your symptoms are repeatedly attributed to 'just stress'
How to Find Better Care
  • Look for providers who specialize in your concern (reproductive endocrinologist for PCOS/endo, menopause specialist for perimenopause)
  • Read reviews specifically mentioning how patients feel heard
  • Ask in condition-specific support groups for provider recommendations
  • During first visit, assess whether they listen, examine, and explain
  • Don't be afraid to try multiple providers until you find the right fit

Related Resources

Testing Guide
Know what to ask for and how to interpret results
Symptom Tracking
Document patterns to strengthen your case
Condition Pages
Understand your diagnosis and treatment options